The Bewilderness of Bert's Birthday - Bonny

Frosty and icy, snowy and bitter, Bert the badger woke up with a chill. That frosty morning it was Bert's birthday. With action, Bert shoved his heavy, chunky, patch worked duvet off his light, soft and furry coat.

He rushed over to Sid the squirrel's home. But of course Sid's home was far up the trunk of an Oak tree with green, crusty star-moss sitting silently at the bottom, with a crooked arm on the trunk pointing north.
Bert shouted as loud as he could, "Everyone hold your ears in 3, 2, 1... SID! That wasn't very loud, let's try again. 3, 2, 1 SID!" Bert almost woke up every animal in the woods and some of them even jumped out of their own skin. But thankfully Sid slowly approached the door.

Once Sid was dressed, he rapidly raced down the tree trunk to the bottom where Bert was standing. Sid asked Bert, in wonder, "Now... What do you want to do and who do you want to come to your party?"
“I would love Paula the Pine-Martin and Roger the Rabbit to come."
So they headed over to their burrows.

Paula and Roger were not like Bert or Sid at all. They were really lazy and slow. Even if they would just speak one single letter it would take at least thirty seconds.

Paula asked "What's the event?" Sid nudged the Pine-Martin and whispered
"Its Bert's Birthday. How can't you see his sash that says 'Happy Birthday?”
"Oh yes, oh yes... Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday dear Bert... Happy birthday to you.

As he was singing the others joined in except for Roger (he didn't agree with it.) Now where shall we go, let's let the birthday boy decide." Said Paula "Mmmmm, I think we should go for a walk; in Lady's Combe," pronounced Bert.

Roger gave a sigh, hoping that Bert would say, “Let's eat carrots or dig holes in the ground."
On the outside Roger had to be happy and excited, but on the inside, it felt like someone had just struck a sword that had been sharpened on a polypore.
As I said Roger was lazy, selfish and a bit stupid.

"Come on everybody, let's go for the walk. I'll just go and get my map." So he rushed into his burrow and ripped out all his clothes to find a crinkled, tea-stained map.
"Aha" Muttered Bert as he pulled the map out of an old rickety trunk.

Bert scrambled up the sooty mud to find some multi- coloured balloons. But instead of air to fill the plastic, it was water and they weren't attached with string, they were sitting on the floor.

Roger poked his head round a Hazel tree and sang with laughter "Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday dear Bert... Happy birthday to you." Bert's face went white with horror and Roger wasn't a rabbit, not at all. He was a hobgoblin. His clothes ripped apart and instead of wearing a waist-coat, he was wearing a rotten jacket with holes and rather big one for his hairy tail.

Roger pointed his big fluffy un-cut finger nailed hand and chanted a few words, then some more, and some more. He seemed to be pointing at the 'H' on Bert's birthday sash. Moments later, the H wasn't on the sash Bert screamed as loud as he possibly could and this time the animals In the woods fainted with horror.

At that moment, Paula came rushing to the rescue, but not to rescue Bert, but to calm him down.
Roger the hobgoblin spoke with a spooky laugh " Mh, ha, ha. Now, you have to go in a quest, a quest to find that 'H'. You have until the third day... Meet me at the two Holly's that are rather close together. I think that they are both King and Queen.
Any way... Meet me. Maw, ha, ha. You leave at once!"

In the morning they left. They looked everywhere for the 'H' but they had no luck. Bert's birthday was ruined. He almost busted into tears! "What an earth am I going to do now. Know birthday, a hobgoblin, and hardly any friends."
Paula noticed a tear run down Bert's check. Bert felt the tear run down his face and it slowly headed into his mouth, Bert tasted the horrible salty water soak through his lips. He gave a little spit, he almost heard the drop onto the floor.

"Now." Interrupted Paula " Let's go and look for that 'H'!" Just as they lifted up their heads they saw a beautiful fairy: some sort of Queen. She looked a bit like a human but she had pointy ears, a beautiful dress and an amazing crown.
" H-h-h-who are you?" Stuttered Bert with a shake and a shimmer...
"I'm Sylvia, Queen of all fairies of this land. I have just been told that you are looking for a 'H' that that horrible, horrible hobgoblin has off your sash. And so I am here to help you find it!" The Queen said that with a grin and a cheer.
" Now, let's go and find that 'H' " Interrupted Paula again.

"Oh... Look, what's this, I-I-I-it's a red letter." Bert came rushing over to Paula " It's a letter!" They cheered and danced around in circles. " But wait..." Paused Bert " How do we get it onto the sash." Sylvia rushed over to Bert and spoke " Hold still, I will put it in for you. Now close your eyes and what ever you do, do not open them. And that goes for both of you.

At that moment, there was one big beam of light that covered the whole woods and for a split second the everything went a blinding white.
"Ok, you can now look," Bert's sash wasn't just a normal birthday sash, but it was beautiful, and most sparky sash In the land. This time Bert's face didn't go white but it went pink and some rosy cheeks appeared onto his fluffy head.

"Party time! Wait, who will come?” First Paula was happy but then she was rather miserable
"The whole of the woods. And before you ask we shall have at my massive palace... Would you like that?" Smiled Sylvia. "Would I would love that a lot, a lot, a lot." Spoke Bert quickly.
"Now... It's party time.
They celebrated from dusk to dawn.
THE END.